End of 2017 Plans

There are 74 days left until 2018 and 20 days until my examination ends. I don’t really know where should I go after I am officially done with school but all I care is that I am just leaving it nicely. The past few months in 2017, I swear I was stressing out. Nothing is working very well in terms of anything. You can say studying, relationship and more to go. Well, past doesn’t deserves any attention, so lets not talk about it. I mean, it’s all dull and boring. Not worth any attentions.

As I said, there are about 20 days left until my examination ends. I was so excited with that, I mean there are many things I have to catch up with. Things like; sleeping, eating, hanging out, going on a vacation and work. Lately, I have been stressing out too, well I am facing a problem where you can call it insomnia. I don’t really have anything to worry about, I am literally done with everyone for now. I have no time to worry about other people, like I have told myself that it is useless to take care of other people when all they do is sugarcoating their words but stabs your back. I am experiencing things that I have planned the actions in my head, well imagination that I have expecting it in reality. Few can say that I am being childish and some might say I am being too sensitive. I won’t apologized on being myself because I am done being such a nice person only to see people blaming me and guilt-trip me.

Oh sorry, I was being salty while ago. Anyways, I am wondering if I should follow my friends going on a vacation or just stay and attend Gala Night which is being done by my school. The only problem for both is that I have no money, I have to buy dress and stuff which I am supposed to need for the night. I don’t even have any dollar for a vacation, I am literally broke. Putting all that asides, I decided to work at a daycare since playing with children can make my day better than anybody else could. I don’t mean anything rude, what I am trying to say is that, watching how happy kids are without having any stresses just made my day better. They deserves something better for all the happiness they had. Thoughts of wanting to have one, but I am too young for that and considering I am not ready, I’ll take it back.

Things have been going around which turns out to be complicated and it’s no use for me to worry too much about it. In returns of how stupid can small things go, I decided to quit and move on with what I am supposed to reach for. Okay, where am I going with this? Back to working at a daycare, I found myself awkward since I am like 17 years old and small. Insecurity at its best for the moment, but for real, imagine working and they might thought I am just a friend. I’m not being funny but, okay if that’s what you thought. Though I am not sure on what to do with my life when school ends, I am the definition of Khalid’s Young Dumb & Broke. Get that promo man. Okay, that is just so lame.

Basically my November 2017 will be a boring month too, depending on what I am going to decide with; Gala Night or a trip with my friends for almost a month, that sounds very absurd but I do need a vacation since I just feel like I need a moment to calm myself down before things started to become more stressing. I swear I am going to be busy after my exam, I just knew that and I keep on saying that because I accidentally recall my plans with my squad. Yes, accidentally. Nah, kidding, my friends are my supporters and yet the reason why I am moving forward with my life. That sounds like I was going to kill myself, but no, they knew my sick past and they are like my school’s family. Cringed, but they are also the reason why I am smiling even when I am down in every classes. You get me? No, okay..

No lies, but I am going to be taken from December 2017 up to March 2018. Everyone become such sweet people after knowing how stress I was back then, how many days and nights I spent in my room crying and not coming out to eat, I opened up on my Instagram which caught half attentions from my followers. That is just so sad. Days after revealing how I felt, my family starts to plan on going a vacation. My brother and his wife decided to bring me to somewhere for sightseeing. My friends are making up plans to do during school breaks. We might be having a sleepover, but it is not confirmed by me. Being a leader, I just have to go through a lot of sufferings but it is fine since I am supposed to manage them ducks. I am sorry friends, I just feel like claiming it that way. Other than that, I am also planning on taking Business course since being a fashion designer doesn’t really make me feel better in my family. I mean, in my point of view, becoming fashion designer won’t work very well in my country. Just saying, ha.

January 2018, I am officially legal baby! Knowing that I am going to drive was nice, but it was annoying that I am going to be the driver of every friends of mine. I was all being nice, giving 24/7 services of ranting session but to know “Pick me up soon” instead of “I’ll pay you soon for letting me rant” like bro, my life is not easy. Listening to 5 or more problems in one day won’t help my fuel to be full always. Kidd, I am a nice friend. No pay just pray. Okay it turns out like I am being dumb.

I decided to stop here, I mean I was going to be a nice person with normal blog to be published. I guess, it’s not the day to be normal today since I kept on being shady. I mean I was writing the blog while rapping to ‘Bed of Lies’ by Nicki Minaj. I am such a pro at that, well by all means, I am thankful and sorry for this blog. I’ll edit it soon once I am in a great mood for that. Have a great day because you deserve it! Be safe and don’t forget your daily meals!


Author: dksa

however, you inhale the positivity and exhale the negativity.

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