The road to success comes through hard work, determination and sacrifice. Success is not built on success. It’s built on failure. It’s built on frustration. Sometimes its built on catastrophe.
Before I start off my things related to the title. I would loved to tell you that I am not a person who loves to study, not even close to become someone who actually like to go to school. I mean, I do, but I hate waking up early. Overall, I am the type of person who would study last minute. Like, a day or two before exam starts, I worked my ass off to study until late night. There would be a 50-50 chances of passing or failing and I did both at once. Nothing to be proud of! But, that’s who I am.
I used to study during the exam day, like if today’s my exam and that’s the day where I’ll study. Guess what? I have failed one subject and pass the others. Might say, a legend but no. That was like, in 2014, so yeah. Deserves an award for studying during the day and passing almost all of the subjects yet graduating with ‘Rank 1, Aggregate 21’. Don’t doubt a lazy-looking person, like me. Hey, I exposed my result. Moving on! We had our first exam during April 2017, I guess, I couldn’t remember the month but it sucks. I failed 6 subjects and credit 2 subjects. Which happens to be English and Commerce, I’m taking the papers as a joke. So what happened was, I’m not ready and I didn’t study because I was seriously not in my mind back then. We got our results and rankings, I was ranked in the last place. No jokes, I’m for real. I felt like I was such a disgrace and I thought negatively of myself. I couldn’t even pretend to be sad about it, plus I was out of the country back then, so I was mentally prepared for all scolds and such others. I have no one to blame on, it was entirely my fault. However, learn your own mistakes, without relying on other people.
Improvements! Recently, my class received our qualification exam papers. We have 8 subjects in total, and I won’t talk about my classmates.. just me. As I mentioned, I failed 6 subjects for our first exam and pass only 2 subjects. The qualifying exam was based on more likely to a payments exam, if you failed a subject, you have to pay for it. I am not sure how the system works but we have to pay. Again, I didn’t study. I did! But not as much as I would, I studied a little for an hour during nighttime. Not to forget, I attended goal-programmed (an extra class for the chosen students of how we can improved our studies, if I am not mistaken) and recently, I was chosen for the peer-coaching programmed (a Friday class for the chosen students where teachers have trust of us having 5 credits and above in O Level) — Not saying the others couldn’t, it is a way of how they want us to study and got credit/pass in the subject we are weak in, I assumed. I used to attend tuition but I quit. Reason was, I have packed schedules and I know that the more we study the more improvements we get. I couldn’t take it, so I think highly of the two programs that I have. Goal and Peer. I make the two programs as the path of helping me to improve my studies and result.
And so, with the classes I have attended. I never felt like, it was demotivating at all. Instead, I took it as a moment of where I would be grateful that I am chosen as one of the students where they believed that I can improved and achieved a better result. Back to the moment of where I said, I didn’t study. I seriously, didn’t study. We had school holidays, then two weeks or three, we have our examination and I wasn’t ready. I was still in my holiday moment. By saying I improved a lot, yes I did. No lies, I may have zero evidence but hey, my juniors or schoolmates are reading my blogs quietly as I am publishing it on public. As a senior, I wouldn’t dare to say something that seems pathetic by reality and on social media. Yet, as a senior, keeping up the good image to your juniors is a must. I wouldn’t know who and when they are reading this, but I would only say thank you for reading. Again, I improved in few subjects. Math, Geography, English and Malay. As for the others, I would almost get a pass. I have like 5 marks or more to get a pass or even better, credit. For someone who didn’t love Math, she made it. I made it. If I’m not mistaken, my overall during the first exam wasn’t even close to 20% which is a total failure. Now, I have 49% for both papers, again.. If I am not mistaken. As for Geography, my eyes shed tears in silence. I went seriously from a low marks up to the highest than before. A short story, I was in 11th place, but since I corrected the calculations of my papers for Geography, I had moved up to 9th out of 23 students. I am satisfied.
So basically, that is the part of my improvements. Then, I would sincerely say that I may not be the best senior, but I did my best to show you my best side. I may also not be the senior that you are looking up to, but I am the senior who is wishing for the best of you in everything.
Inspiration! There are no specific reason on why I started writing blogs, I just feel like sharing something. I am not the kind of person who can say something out loud, I found it really hard to do so. I also quit writing fiction stories, because it wasn’t my type to write something up on my imaginations. Especially, when my brain won’t make any good ideas of better story-line. Writing blogs, I actually wrote it based on my mood, feelings and what I wanted to say. New Chapter, was based on how I learned to accept things and telling the public how I am changing myself into someone better than before. Happiness, was based on how I finally started to feel happy like a little kid who have received a chocolate for being good and how I wanted to tell people that there’s nothing wrong on being happy over a small thing. Goodbye, it was actually dedicated to someone who I used to love.. currently I still am loving him but I am starting to walk away because it is for the better and how I couldn’t help but keeping the memories of us as everything started to fade. Better By Times, it is about how I am getting better by days. Believing myself that I am stronger and I can do it. It is related to Goodbye. Childhood, was a random blog that I came up with, because last night I was reminiscing about it and the thoughts of being a kid once again just made me feel like writing it.
This is another random blog that appeared out of nowhere, and yet published to public because I am in the mood of writing a new blog, perhaps blogs. I may not be the best author of making blogs, but as I have told you, I am writing based on the moment I am in or feels. A little update: I am slowly recovering from my heartbreak and finally started to feel better by my own. I am breathing the good air without someone. Last but not least, I would loved to thank those who read my blogs silently. You may or may not support me, but I really do hope that everything you have or achieving right now will be the better ones. Do have a very great day!
“The master has failed more times than the beginner has even tried” – Anonymous.
“Don’t worry about failures, worry about the chances you miss when you don’t even try” – Jack Canfield.